Parent experience: the impact of allergies on family life

Many parents reach out to us at different stages of their parenting journey, whether their child has been newly diagnosed with an allergy, is starting school, going on holiday, or moving to university halls. It’s easy to forget that allergies don’t just affect the child, but also their loved ones.

For this Mother’s Day, we’ve spoken to one mother of a 17-year-old who was diagnosed with food allergies at the age of six. She shares her personal journey, reflecting on what has helped her family, as well as her child manage their allergies independently.

Their journey shows how many challenges can be turned into positives with the right care and a supportive environment.

Elia’s experience

Navigating school life

When my child was first diagnosed with allergies, I wasn’t initially scared. It was only after several near misses at school – culminating in anaphylaxis in 2017 – that anxiety set in.

Determined to advocate for my son and improve his school experience, I took the time to educate myself on allergy protocols. This not only benefitted my child but also helped other students with allergies.

Some of the key resources I found invaluable included:

• Food Standard Agency: its free online Food Allergy Training gave me a solid understanding of allergen information, management, and labelling.
• Supporting pupils at school with medical conditions: the statutory guidance that schools must follow when making provision for children. It sets out the responsibilities of schools and parents and clarified the role of Individual Healthcare Plans in ensuring children’s medical needs are met.
• The Equality Act 2010: What teachers need to know and what schools need to do: some serious allergies may be considered a disability meaning that schools should make reasonable adjustments to create an inclusive environment.
• Allergy organisations such as Anaphylaxis UK – Their resources help guide schools in allergy management.

Through raising awareness with his teachers, the school began discussing allergies with all students. With my son’s permission, his allergies were shared with his peers, and his friends became his allergy advocates. They would discuss his allergies with their parents, who would then reach out before events to check what they could do to make sure he was safely included.

Social life challenges

Outside of school, social events like playdates and birthday parties posed their own challenges. While I didn’t expect other families to prepare safe food, I also didn’t want my son to feel left out. By initiating conversations about his allergies and demonstrating how to use his adrenaline auto-injector (AAI) should an emergency occur, other parents were always understanding.

We also provided his own food when he visited friends to ensure his safety, as well as safe treats such as dairy-free ice cream or cookies to share, so he could enjoy a treat alongside his friends.

Transition to self-care

Initially, my son’s AAIs were kept in the school surgery, but as he grew older, he began carrying them himself. He was hesitant at first, but our consultant used a great analogy: “Just as we wear seatbelts in cars for protection, not out of fear, carrying an AAI was a precaution, not a prediction.”

Now, he always carries his medication in a specialist medical bag which protects his medicine from extreme temperatures. His friends are also aware of where he keeps his AAIs and choose restaurants where he feels safe.

A positive allergy journey

Despite the challenges, there have also been many positives to our allergy journey. For instance, while eczema and asthma made sports difficult, he found joy in music, playing in the National Children’s Orchestra, and earning a place at the Junior Academy of the Royal Academy of Music.

He also enjoys being involved in allergy research and seeing firsthand the progress in allergy care.

Raising awareness and having open discussions about allergies with his teachers has made his schools more allergy-aware, creating safer environments for future students.

Additionally, cooking from scratch has become a family habit, leading to healthier eating for all of us. We still dine out at allergy-friendly restaurants, and it’s encouraging to see more and more places improving their allergy provisions.

The support of those around us has been crucial to our journey. The medical teams at St. Mary’s Hospital in London and Chelsea & Westminster Hospital have been outstanding, and the support from friends has been invaluable.

As a family, my son’s allergies have brought us closer together; we function as a team with the shared goal of keeping him safe.

Hopes for the future

Looking ahead, I hope that increased awareness, understanding, and compassion for those with allergies continues to grow. I hope that schools and public institutions prioritise allergies and work towards true inclusion. Additionally, I hope for improvements in allergy care for all affected, including reduced waiting times.

Allergies impact every aspect of life, but with awareness and support, we can create a safer and more inclusive world for children like my son.

By Elia Hughes

More information

If you would like more information on managing allergies at school, please visit our Safer Schools Programme, led by qualified teacher and allergy parent Tracey Dunn. Developed to help both teachers and pupils, this comprehensive guide encourages a whole-school allergy awareness approach and includes free downloadable to assist schools in developing their allergy policy and procedures.

Looking for ideas on allergy-friendly Mother’s Day gifts? Go here